Dear Wordcount

You suck.

Dear Nano,
You are behind. Majorly. Go talk to the Wordcount ASAP about catching up.

Dear Unexpected And Horrible Japanese End-Of-Term Exam,
WTF?! Why didn't you tell us about this earlier?
...actually, wait, then the drop-out rate would have been even higher than presently. You suck too.

Dear Japanese In General,
You are cool, but there is too much of you. Also, particles. Your particles are baaaad. And let us not mention your verbs.

Dear Laurence,
You know, you're kind of cool too, even if you're secretly a self-centred little bastard and only managing to hide it by disliking confrontation to such an extent you'll do pretty much anything to avoid it. That's ok. I can live with that. You're going to have to as well. Now find the bloody Foreign Office and get to work, lazybones.

Dear Irene,
Turn up, please. I don't care what you say to Laurence, just get in there and start talking to him.

Dear Lord Worthington,
You are not having a main part.

Love and kisses,
Ev