Dear Actors,

No, no, no! You cannot just decide to uproot yourselves and go off to start a collective farm in Kazahkstan. That is Not On. Even if you would be farming rasperries, loganberries, and all kinds of lovely squishy fruit. I don't think they even Have them in Kazahkstan. Much as I appreciate you taking initiative and trying to do something with your small section of subplot - just...don't. Are we clear?

Oh yes, and I take great pleasure in informing you that I have had the liquor cabinet hermetically sealed. So much for drinking your banana-y way to the Arthur Scargill Red Berry Kolchos.

Dear Fred and Simon,

Working on those names, are we?

The extremely short-tempered author (with morning hair)
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